Step by Step, Not necessarily giant leaps!

Sitting here thinking about a few things, I have to say that one person from my past ( who influenced my life so much) that taught me that I can do anything I want IF I try and work hard enough was a teacher, Sharon Cox, from 1^st-4^th grade.  Yes, four grades, I lived in a small community where you had four grades in one classroom.  Mrs. Cox was the special education teacher. Not that I was special Ed, but I did need lots of help, guidance and encouragement.  You see, I couldn’t say many letters of the alphabet, making reading hard.  I was teased by everyone and my self-esteem was low. Mrs. Cox worked with me every day, and I remember that in 4^th grade (after 4 years of work) I was able to give a puppet show, The three little pigs, to the whole classroom, using the correct language, and speaking each work correctly. 
She taught me that it may take time to get what you want, it may not come over night but keep working and it will happen. She reinforced what my parents taught me, to never give up, even when it is hard. Leaving me with the desire to excel in what I am doing or working on and never giving up even when things are hard.
I was recently told that: “A person whose faith has been severely tested, yet who has come through the battle victoriously, is the person to whom greater tests, and more responsibilities, will come.”  OK, Lord, I want to do YOUR will… but to be honest here, I don’t want any more test and/or responsibilities. I think I have had enough to last me a lifetime. I am going to be a little selfish here as ask you to see it my way for just a little while.  Lord, I know what your word says but it hard for me to comprehend at times… You know that I want to continue to follow, endure, and work to concur each thing tossed my way, but it is so hard sometimes. Searching the word helps me break it down to make me understand it better (although in reality it is still HARD to want to fight/work for what I want and know it the right thing to do):

“The master was full of praise.  ‘Well done, my good and faithful servant.  You have been faithful in handling this small amount, so now I will give you many more responsibilities.  Let’s celebrate together!”  Matthew 25: 21

God knows everything, right?  He knows what’s in our hearts.  He can turn a dirty and wretched sinner’s life completely around.  If He can foresee it all and knows the faithful-godly person we will become… why does He allow the many trials and crazy situations intended by Satan to shipwreck our faith?  Why do we have to endure so much doom and gloom in our lives if He already knows what the outcome is going to be?  This is something that I wondered about. 

“And we know all things work out for the good of those who love God and are called according to His purposes.”   Romans 8: 28

Take suffering as an example.  If God is going to heal me, then why go through it in the first place?  Just by reading the Bible, I see that God sometimes allows things to happen to teach us about faith and to glorify Himself – He allows something He hates because it accomplishes what He loves.  That’s a hard truth to wrap my little brain around when I see some of the ugly things in front of me.  Even though God knows a beautiful gem will be the result, I still have to go through the ugly stuff!  I (we) need to go through it, because whatever it is… makes me (us) who I am (we are).  It makes us strong.  It makes me (us) able to endure. We learn to persevere, and we grow in character.  We can comfort others who go through the same or similar things, where others can only try to understand.
“Be assured and understand that the trial and proving of your faith bring out endurance and steadfastness and patience. 4) But let endurance and steadfastness and patience have full play and do a thorough work, so that you be perfectly and fully developed (with no defects) lacking in nothing.”  James 1:3-4
Lord, as I stop now, I want to thank you for being you! You are the only one who knows my real past, present and future. You are the one I turn to for the strength that I need to get through each trial I go through.  I also want to thank you for placing people in my life even at a very young age to help guide me in the right direction.